And why you want a partner?
It want to seems like a silly question but if you think a little you will see that is not so easy to answer. When I ask this to people who come for help many of them get entangled in justifications and are slow to reach the merits. It's normal, if you are not used to talking about your own needs, and yet it is something that is suitable to do before dating .
It might sound some of these justifications : Seeking partner because " I'm on age," "because I do not know which side I'm going to put my family if this year do not I take anyone for Christmas," " because I want to fall in love " " because I want to live a normal life like everyone else " ... and yet these phrases do not tell me anything about you and your needs , which is what I find .
Look, lead a normal life without a partner can lead perfectly and , let me tell you that your little family should decide on your loving future either . What interests me is to discover what is so important that will provide the couple and the couple only when you have.
Discover the "why " you do things finally gives meaning to them .
I give you an example, I when I got to looking really , was when I realized I did not want to be alone more . He wanted peace , emotional stability and wanted a "nest" where feel loved , safe and where to start a family . In short : I wanted to share part of my life with someone . And that's what I want you to find out . And if you can sum that up in two seconds better because that's what you remember when you go to look for.
Why do I want you to do this ? To be able to reflect on two things :
1st ) A relationship is not the same as love. Confuses people and it is true that without love there can not be a healthy relationship but may be perfectly unrelated love too. There are people who just want the flirts , the flirting , the butterflies in the stomach , but when I ask for something more than the relationship should provide them do not know what to say , which is that there are people who do not want a relationship , is say they do not want a commitment ...and be clear what you want is critical to look or not!
2nd) The couple is not the only source of needs. Maybe you take off a list of 10 things that person supposedly going to do for you and read the list you realize that these things can get by yourself in other ways without being precisely through a relationship .
So, come , I ask again ... what YOU want from relationship?
One does not seek couple actually seeking is stability , connection, intimacy , companionship , safe sex, affection , understanding, support , family life ...
When you have a clear definition , record it in your
mind, because sooner or later you will have to remember to overcome
these horrible appointments and disappointments that people give us
And remember much dear reader, because I will be your only source of daily motivation .