Holiday gifts for lovers

(The very best insights to the difficult questions from the dating forum)

I hope this isn’t too stupid a question to ask but I really am clueless about this. I’m dating a married woman who has a little bit of money. My birthday was in October and she bought me a flat screen TV. It was really generous of her and I appreciate it. With Christmas coming I am wondering what to do. I want to buy her something great too. I asked her what she might want and she told me not to get her anything. She said it would be too hard to explain it to her husband. I may be only 26 but I’m old enough to know when a women says don’t get me anything she might be lying. Should I just go ahead and get her a gift? If I don’t, am I going to be in trouble?

You’re adorable.

But I have to go with the Married Girlfriend on this one. Don’t buy her anything that she would have to explain. Even an obvious little line like, “I bought that for myself” forces a lie and a story and a moment that just didn’t need to happen. Don’t do it. Don’t create unnecessary situations that need lies.

If you really want to get her something, it has to be something that doesn’t go home with her. If you meet at your place, giving her sensual massage oils or bath bubbles or even a silk robe that she will use and leave there, is ok. Think edible and sexual. You could cook her a nice meal if your dates allow for that. Maybe serve it in bed. Or bring her strawberries and wine while she’s in the bubble bath.

If you don’t meet at your place, then it has to be something like a single serving piece of chocolate wrapped up pretty. Something that will be gone by the end of the visit.